Selfishness – One of Its Functions & Pleasures

Selfishness

Selfishness is really a multi-faceted defect, and so this blog post is only going to concentrate on one of its facets, and this facet centres around one observation and this observation is that selfishness tends to increase when some hardship with other people is experienced.

Why?

This is quite easy to answer because selfishness is a mechanism of self-protection. It knows that being alone we are safe and no one can hurt us. Being with others we know that the danger is there, that we could get hurt once again while being in the presence of others, so naturally and logically we seek isolation.

Selfishness then is a mechanism of compensation, it promises pleasure, projecting ideas of us being alone doing something that we can only really do alone and of course we are there enjoying it immensely. We project ideas of going for a long walk along the beach, reading as much as we like, meditating somewhere peaceful, watching movies, etc. etc.

Animal in Nature

Well true many animals exhibit this kind of behaviour when they are hurt they isolate themselves until they are better, they do it as a means of self-protection.

Pleasure

The pleasure aspect of selfishness is the big part. If there were no selfishness involved then there would be no selfish behaviour. The main reason why we obey the ideas and projections of selfishness is because it promises us immense pleasure and enjoyment.

Conclusion

We may revel in the pleasure of selfishness but from experience that pleasure soon turns bitter because it may not be something we deserve and we end up hurting others or neglecting that which should not be neglected. We usually go out of balance when we dive into the pleasure of selfishness and being out of balance of brings pain in the moments when we have to regain our balance. Think about it and try it out for yourself, see if it is true in your experience.

End.

Self-Compassion is an Inner Mechanism of Compensation for When we Fail

Introduction

This is a very strange assertion: to say that self-compassion is an inner mechanism of compensation for when we fail. The aim of this post is to make this statement a lot more understandable and ultimately real to you.

Compassion of a very ordinary mechanical type is brought forth in people when we see that others are suffering, undergoing a difficult time or have failed in something or rather, and or are worse off than ourselves. So self-compassion is ourselves giving that to ourselves, but in the wrong way, where we just end up getting stuck, not getting up (and trying again) and feeling worse and worse about ourselves, others, our situation and the world.

An Inner Mechanism of Compensation?

Self-compassion is really a compensation for when we fail in life, or in any endeavour that we undertake, whether it be something in our human life or something in our spiritual life.

When we fail we need something to console us and to commiserate our failure, and we have just that element inside of ourselves, and that element is what we call self-compassion. It is a psychological characteristic or ‘I’ (ego, one of the many that we have) that feels sorry for ourselves and says things like, I’m a failure, I’m doing nothing in life, I’m going nowhere, I’m not going to make it. We feel that we can’t achieve, that we can’t get to where we want to go.

 Self-compassion seeks others that are sympathetic to its failure and join us in our lamentations about having failed. It doesn’t like people who say: “get up and try again” and or “stop feeling sorry for yourself and just do it”. This is because it wants to compensate for its failure by giving itself compassion, recovery time, rest, feel good movies, feel good comfort food, lamentations, regrets, going over and over the reasons why we failed, blaming others etc. etc.

A Debt with Ourselves

When we don’t do all that we can, in other words when we don’t give our best we create a debt with ourselves. Or when we have an expectation of ourself, we create a debt with ourselves when we fail. And to compensate for that debt or to pay that debt we have the psychological element called self-compassion that trues to cancel that debt by giving ourselves compassion of a negative type, justifying the failure saying that wea re useless and good for nothing.

The Right Kind of Self-Compassion

If we were to say to people don’t have compassion with yourself, a lot of people would protest. We actually want to say don’t have the negative type of self-compassion with yourself. Definitely don’t indulge in that and go ahead and eliminate it, already.

You can have the positive self-compassion which recognises that we failed and impulses us to get up immediately and learn about where we failed, and try again correcting our path that lead to our failure. Get up, repent, repair and go again until you triumph, that is the real self-compassion because that is what brings you hope, makes you authentically feel better and leads you to triumph which is entirely in your benefit. The other negative type of self-compassion leads you in a hole that you dig deeper and deeper every minute that you don’t get out of it.

Conclusion

So I really hope that we have made this topic of self-compassion a lot clearer and that you may find it useful for when you feel self-compassion to be able to understand that when we feel this way, we are only trying to balance our failure and we don’t need self-compassion to do that for us we can do it by trying again, getting up and going again!

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Lust is About Imbalance

Introduction

This is a very strange assertion: to say that lust is about an imbalance. The aim of this post is to make this statement much more understandable.

How is Lust an Imbalance?

Due to desire a need is born inside of us, and this need pushes us from inside to go and balance this desire with fulfilment or satisfaction.

Lust looks to make its desire a reality, or in other words it tries in its first attempt to find someone to satisfy or satiate its desire. Lust has the in-built need to balance its desires with real sensations or anything else that bring some satisfaction and therefore balance.

Desire Equals Imbalance

Somewhere within us there is a scale and on one side there is the desire weighing heavily and on the other side there is nothing there but an empty plate. This empty plate creates an imbalance, and as it is a law of nature to always seek a state of balance or equilibrium, the human being in this situation looks for a way to add something to the empty side of the scale so to balance the heavier side.

When we have some sort of desire we automatically imbalance the magic scale that we have inside of ourselves. If there is no desire unbalancing our scale there is no lustful action or action of compensation which in general is what the ego is.

How Does Lust Try to Balance its Desires?

Lust first of all looks to action to balance its desires. It tries to find physical satisfaction that according to the nature of lust (sexuality trapped in matter and the senses) does this using another person. If it can not do this with another person it goes into fantasy, and with fantasy the desire is fulfilled. Fantasy is nothing other than a mechanism of compensation, we act out with our fantasy what we can not do physically.

The truth or the revelation that Gnosis or an any system of in-depth esoteric self-knowledge provides us with, is that we have to learn not to depend on others to balance our inner urges and desires. One clear reason is because we can’t rely on others, they are not always there, or they are uncooperative and if we force them to comply we are doing something very wrong. So in essence, we have to learn how to balance our desires ourself and by ourselves.

How can we Balance the Natural Sexual Appetite without Lust?

We have the transmutation for that and the act of internal self-remembering. Transmuting our sexual energy transforms that desire into will, dignity, energy and well-being. When we transmute, the desire dissipates, the desire is not satisfied but rather transformed.

When the desire is transformed the heavy weight weighing down one side of our internal scale is removed and then our internal scale naturally balances itself. So that is the trick.

If lust wants attention from another person in order to get some sensation then we are once again unbalanced and we have to balance ourselves once again to arrive at peace.

The trick here is to give that attention to ourselves, that is to our own sexual energy or sexuality. That is to give it attention with conscious love, which is an attention that does not corrupt and does not cause the person to fall into vice. In other words to appreciate your sexual energy, to accept it, to care for it, and to transmute it enjoying how it enhances our inner Being. This is self-remembering; to recognise the great divine power that there is in sexuality and in our sexual energy.

Conclusion

When we experience sexual desire we end up getting unbalanced, and when we also feed that desire through impressions, fantasy and thoughts we get even further unbalanced. So like many other egos lust is a way of bringing balance to this imbalance that we create inside of ourselves. The key is understand this and then to go about balancing this ourselves by ourselves without lust and with or without another human being, either way (with or without another) it is done and can be done without lust. This is best and this will show you that you don’t need lust to manage your sexuality and you can take steps to eliminate it.

End.